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Neal Boulton's HeroinLife: The High Risk Read About Living—Beyond the Needle

Daily Reminders


I relapsed recently. I can't say it was all horrible because it wasn't. But what was horrible was this gut ache of utter remorse I had after. That and, as I always forgets happens, the obsession for more is still haunting me like some whacked kind of ghost. I have come to believe that my addiction is more like a disease of my memory: I never remember how dangerous this all is, or the sickness, or the depression and obsession that follows me after I use. The old junkies who continue to help me are right. Daily reminders—like don't pick up and you won't get high—are key for me.

Rolley F., Denver, CO

By Neal Boulton at 8:27PM on February 02, 2012
posted by
February 03 at 5:24pm

I think it's fantastic what you are doing here. Job well done, sir!



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This Month's HeroinLife.com

 

Pg.1

"I've been "wide awake" hundreds of times. I'm that heroin addict who detoxes then returns to work, "Hey, where you been? Wow, you're looking good," only to start slamming the next day in the men's room...."

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Pg.3

"For some reason, the holidays challenge me. Just when everyone else gets happy, I tend to isolate and withdraw slightly. Problem is that 'slightly' evolves into no meetings and no calls to my support group, and worse...."

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Pg.5

In a poll of 5,243 HeroinLife readers, 41% of you told us that you relapsed more than once in your first year of attempting to get clean. "I'm grateful to be clean now almost 3 years," Dean T., of Newark said...."

___________

 

Pg.7

"Through all the rehabs, therapy, groups and counseling I have been through I've searched for a deeper reason for why I got high. I wanted something to blame it on, some significant moment in my life that..."

___________

Pg.9

"The key for me? I call someone who is also clean—and I don't pick up one day at a time. Sometimes for me, it's...."

___________

 

Pg.11

"I laugh at the swagger of guys who are clean but still maintain their old drug personas. The Badasses. I let all that go when my...."

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Pg.
13

"When I was lost to my addiction—he'd sing to me to get well, 'Mommy.' That he went before me because of dope will always...."

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Pg.15

"All of my peers have surpassed me: they have more money, more savings; they have homes, careers, and cars. They are thinking about...."

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